Primal Nudgings


Befriending your Inner Critic
Getting Out of Your Own Way

Befriending your Inner Critic (formerly Primal Whisperings) is a 4-day retreat for men and women to transform their inner critic into an advocate and ally.

Gently. This isn't a confrontational experience. The Befriending your Inner Critic retreat uses music, visual arts, movement, guided meditation, laughter and story to help men and women build (and rebuild) relationship with their inner critic. Think of it like mediation, for you and your critic, or facilitating a creative meeting of the minds.

Come prepared: For 2 weeks leading up to the retreat, carry a small notebook and pen with you. Capture the “stops” in your day. Write down each time you hear negative self-talk and notice if it you stop yourself from doing something. This is an exercise in building awareness, not judgment, so just notice the stops, that's all.

In Befriending your Inner Critic you will have an opportunity to:

Establish a healthy distance between you and your critic
The first evening of the retreat is an opportunity for everyone to introduce themselves, and their critics. We also do some work with intuition and storytelling. It is a gentle start.

Call out the hidden critic
The second day begins by building an awareness of how you physically live with your critic. How do you and your critic share your body? What does your critic sound like? Look like? What triggers the critic? This day is devoted to getting to know your critic in a nonthreatening way. Put simply, this day is about play.

Tell your critic what you want
On the third day, we move through meditations and guided visualizations so that you can visualize a healthy relationship with your critic and ask for what you want from the relationship.

Transform your critic into your ally
On the final day we look at how you can build on this foundational work to maintain a healthy relationship with your critic. Using the Satir model, we look at triggers in the family and talk about strategies you can use to diffuse negative self-talk when it is triggered.

Note: Taking time to process is critical, and is built into the sessions. Outside of the sessions, you have the opportunity to take meals with the group or on your own. And there are breaks, which you can use to be by yourself, take a nap, do some body work, or talk to someone that you've connected with. We do a lot together in a short amount of time, but you are completely in control of your experience. The retreat is designed to honour your needs, and you are encouraged to do the same.

Who comes to befriend their critic?

Men and women who want to:

  • accept themselves
  • trust themselves
  • stop the negative self-talk
  • build confidence in themselves
  • practice present moment awareness
  • be intentional about the language they use in inner dialogue
  • let go of habitual responses to triggers
  • accomplish their desires.

Have you ever stopped yourself from doing or having what you truly want by telling yourself you aren't good enough, smart enough, young enough, thin enough, talented or deserving enough? When the critic comes out, do you tell yourself you are just being realistic, or reasonable? Self-defeatism isn't reasonable. This program gives you an opportunity to experience letting go of limiting beliefs, and quieting the chatter that stops you from living your potential.

But what happens after the retreat?

“Just wanted to say hello and how well I have been feeling since our group. The masks and marvellous sharing gave me such a wonderful insight into parts of myself that one normally may not get to see” .CJ

“Befriending your Inner Critic......I believe, the environment created during the course, encouraged the bird (me) who sat within her cage with the door open to venture out and fly. I find myself going out more and more often and I know I can always return to my safe place. Each person in the course gave me an introduction to a little part of me. I was able to capture the essence of humaness and see how each of us create our own unique way of being in the world. Thank you so much.....”

The truth of it
If you can turn your critic into your ally, the negative self-talk will be transformed into positive reinforcement and the energy you have used to stop yourself, becomes energy to propel yourself forward.

When: The next retreat begins the evening of July 12th and runs until late afternoon on July 15th, 2018.

Where: The Haven Resort, Gabriola Island, BC Canada
You can contact The Haven for assistance booking your travel and accommodation, though you are not required to stay at the resort to participate in the retreat. Click here for more information on the island, places to go and sights to see.

Cost: $600.00 (Accommodation and meals extra.)
For a package price inclusive of accommodation and meals at the Haven please contact The Haven.

For more information on retreat facilitator Marlyn Farrel click here.

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